[on chivalry] i wasn't actually expecting a response to my whining about Blogspot, but out of nowhere Wayne Toshikazu Olson has offered to give me a little space for my blog. i am going to need some help figuring stuff out, but i can use Moveable Type or Blogger and get email at wayneolson.com and everything. Wayne's my hero. Thank you!

[a pet peeve] one of my undergraduate pet peeves is professors who inform the class that they have graded something important (test/paper/project) at the beginning of a class session, explain their disappointment in the grades overall, and then proceed to lecture and give the assignment back at the end of the session. my Evangelicalism professor did that today concerning our take home exams. i am usually not particularly grade focused, but that's something that drives me to worry. luckily, my Shakespeare professor did it right: lecture, end five minutes early, talk and pass out papers. No one even suspects they are coming.

[i am so unreasonable] i received my phone bill today and was slightly angry at UNC Telecom. i am such a moron. i know my own rates. what was i thinking, they arbitrarily charge me for calls i don't make?

[on the weather] It was one of the coldest days of the year and so i was all bundled up in a fleece, warm hat (the kind the southerners call toboggans), gloves and a big scarf. No one recognized me! Not even close friends. Now i know, if i want to do something scandalous, wear winter outerwear.

spinning: mike garrigan songs in preparation for seeing him tonight
reading: Novum Testamentum Graece (Nestle-Aland's 27th)

i know i shouldn't complain about free stuff, but blogspot has been so spacey lately. Part of me wishes i were cool like Wendy and a nice domain-owning person might give me my own space. However, not all boys can be as chivalrous as Brandon. i actually remember him swearing that fizzybluesoda hosting had nothing to do with his feelings for Wendy. ha!

i got home a bit ago from a hard InterVarsity c-team meeting. i did a terrible job of showing grace and patience in the midst of my frustration. what song pops in my head and won't go away? Don Henley's "Heart of the Matter." "The more I know, the less I understand / All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again / I've been tryin' to get down to the heart of the matter / But my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter / But I think it's about forgiveness / Forgiveness / Even if, even if you don't love me anymore." Hmmm... the Holy Spirit convicts in mysterious ways...

Because it was so cold today, our soccer instructor had our PE class work out inside. i have always hated going to the SRC, probably because the majority of my friends go for aerobics classes, which i don't enjoy, and whenever i use cardio machines like treadmills or stationary bikes or climbers i always think "i'd much rather be doing this for real outside." However, today i discovered the rowing machine. How fun! i rowed 4.5 kilometres in 30 minutes. i also spent 15 minutes biking (*yawn*). i may actually make regular trips to the gym to row when it is too cold/wet to run!

i finally finished my American Evangelicalism take home exam. Short essays on the components of American Pentecostalism and the role of the Dispensationalism in the 20th century. you can read them here. N.B. the time of this post in case of any glaring errors.

It's Monday, so i babysat. Those kids are hilarious. The four-year-old boy kept saying, "You're not nice!" And so i asked him why. "Because i said so!" "Are any of your babysitters nice?" "...Some" "And not me, because..." "Because you are irregular! if you babysat us twice a week, i'd like you more!" it was hard not to laugh at that. We were playing outside (soccer, bike riding) and he asked me to trace him in chalk and draw him playing soccer. i did a good job, especially with sidewalk chalk and he proclaimed "i think you are nice, but just today!" He, his younger sister and i played some games and then they asked to put on a movie. It was a cartoon about the early church. Quality entertainment. I also read several books to them, something to note since i am giving such a full account of my three hours there.

I had to get to their house to watch them, and with a non-operational vehicle, that was not the easiest task. i left soccer, ran the width of campus, caught a bus, rode for five minutes and ran another mile to get to my ex-boyfriend's apartment to borrow his car. My ex is the coolest ex ever. He lent me his car and a few weeks ago he and some of his roommates made me an amazing dinner of jumbalaya with a side of tomato basil couscous and smoothies for dessert. We even took a class together the semester after we broke up, shared texts and passed notes. Honestly, who could ask for a better friend who you happened to have been dating once upon a time? (N.B. our break-up was for the greater good of both parties, being that we are absolutely terrible for each other, which really helps foster a solid friendship post-break-up.)

i am about to head to Davis Library to get some work done which means i will be
reading: Merchant of Venice and various things for Evangelicalism
spinning: pedro the lion _it's hard to find a friend_

hey all you doubters... it's still rough, but it DOES exist.

w y c l i f ' s . b l o g

spinning: random brit pop mp3s because i am a loser college student and pirate music.
reading: take a wild guess... Calvin!

Arise, my soul, arise; shake off thy guilty fears; the bleeding sacrifice in my behalf appears:
Before the throne my surety stands, Before the throne my surety stands,
My name is written on His hands.

He ever lives above, for me to intercede; His all redeeming love, His precious blood, to plead:
His blood atoned for all our race, His blood atoned for all our race,
And sprinkles now the throne of grace.

Five bleeding wounds He bears; received on Calvary; They pour effectual prayers; they strongly plead for me:
"Forgive him, O forgive," they cry, "Forgive him, O forgive,?" they cry,
"Nor let that ransomed sinner die!"

My God is reconciled; His pardoning voice I hear; He owns me for His child; I can no longer fear:
With confidence I now draw nigh, With confidence I now draw nigh,
And "Father, Abba, Father," cry.
--words by Charles Wesley

i spent this afternoon at the mall. i loathe the mall, but a few things made the trip redeeming. i did find two nice shirts and a pair of cords for total of $20 at Banana Republic, my only purchases of the day. and i was with one of my favourite people on earth. lots of things earned her that distinction, but comments like this one today only help to seal the deal. "i grew up with the PCA version of dead heads. if you could follow the Westminister Confession around, i'm sure they would have."

spinning: glen phillips _abulum_
reading: the Institutes

"But as the greater part of mankind, enslaved by error, walk blindfold in this glorious theatre, he exclaims that it is a rare and singular wisdom to meditate carefully on these works of God, which many, who seem most sharp-sighted in other respects, behold without profit. It is indeed true, that the brightest manifestation of divine glory finds not one genuine spectator among a hundred. Still, neither his power nor his wisdom is shrouded in darkness. His power is strikingly displayed when the rage of the wicked, to all appearance irresistible, is crushed in a single moment; their arrogance subdued, their strongest bulwarks overthrown, their armour dashed to pieces, their strength broken, their schemes defeated without an effort, and audacity which set itself above the heavens is precipitated to the lowest depths of the earth. On the other hand, the poor are raised up out of the dust, and the needy lifted out of the dung hill (Ps. 113:7), the oppressed and afflicted are rescued in extremity, the despairing animated with hope, the unarmed defeat the armed, the few the many, the weak the strong. The excellence of the divine wisdom is manifested in distributing everything in due season, confounding the wisdom of the world, and taking the wise in their own craftiness (1 Cor. 3:19); in short, conducting all things in perfect accordance with reason." --John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, Book I, Chapter 5

i added some more blogs to my link list. if i missed you, please let me know. i also added some assorted things to my amazon wish list. my half-birthday is just around the corner, if you need an excuse to buy me something ;o)

spinning: david spencer's demo
reading: Calvin's ICR

a portrait of the blogger as a frantic college student
i woke up this morning at 5:28, with every intention of writing the eight page Shakespeare paper i hadn't started yet. i wrote a few emails. i read a dozen blogs. i thought about some topics to write about in my paper. i took a shower. i wrote a thesis. i took a nap. i arose at 12:45. 12:45! i barely had a thesis and i needed eight pages plus title page plus works cited page printed and under my professor's door by five! so i read another dozen blogs and made some coffee and reread a few passages in the plays. then i began plugging away. my mom called and asked me a dozen questions that took an eternity to answer. my roommate returned from class and lunch at about 2:30 and proceeded to talk on the phone and to people that dropped by. 3:30 came and i had written just over four and a half pages. my roommate kindly asked, "can i turn on some music?" and switched off Revolver (the last thing i had in the communal cd player) and turned on lame top forty radio. At this point, i was getting frantic trying to write as fast as i was thinking and G105 was even more repulsive than ever before. so i relocated to the computer lab downstairs, finished almost eight full pages by 4:32 and printed two copies. i stuck my copies of A Midsummer Night's Dream and Henry IV, 1 in my mailbox and walked up to Greenlaw and dropped off the paper at 4:49. Despite the fact that the departmental secretary giggled at me, i was proud i had eleven minutes to spare. All of the sudden, it hit me. i had to go pick up my check by 5! i began the trek across campus to my office. on the way i was accosted by a very cute Girl Scout in uniform trying to sell me cookies. Having eaten only a brownie all day, i caved in and bought some Thin Mints (N.B. if they were still $2.50 i would have also sprung for Samoas) and hurried up to work. i got my check and proceeded to the bank to deposit it and withdraw my weekly stipend. i was filling out my deposit slip and realized, after five or six years, that i finally knew my account number! it was a true miracle. i moseyed on home to find that i had gotten a package, which always brightens my day. while waiting to get my package, i saw two friends who invited me to go out with them tonight. so i came home with some cash, girl scout cookies, a package and plans. can't beat it with a stick.

spinning: pierce pettis, pedro the lion and bruce cockburn
reading: nothing tonight!

Most people that know me relatively well know that i have terrible vision--i'm quite nearsighted with a generous dash of astigmatism. i have trouble taking three steps without glasses or contact lenses. i appreciate those corrective lenses because they give me a chance to visually experience the world in drastically different ways from when i am without them. One thing less people know about me is that i have an underdeveloped sense of smell. Think Herbal Essences conditioner, strong cologne or perfume and cooking smells as the start of my smell threshold. i've occasionally lamented my dull smelling capability but i just realised, it's as much of a blessing as a curse. From what i hear, there are some terrible smells in the world.

Tonight i will be writing a very long paper on Shakespeare's second stages of the wood and tavern in A Midsummer Night's Dream and Henry IV, Part I. If you have any insight into this topic, don't hesitate to drop me a line. You could become my favourite person of the day. A limited amount of distraction is also encouraged :o)

spinning: _a few ditties_ by the Jack Jirak band
reading: Calvin and Augustine by Benjamin Warfield

Okay, i've noticed in Credenda/Agenda that the Dougs call Old Testament people "Christians." They were before Christ! That makes no sense to me at all. What's the deal? i've been confused on this for quite some time and just haven't got around to reading about it, so i figured i'd poll y'all, my knowledgeable readers.

spinning: nothing. i am at work listening to the sound of traffic go by on Pittsboro St.
reading: back issues of Re:Generation Quarterly online. i clearly remember when i first found Re:Gen Q at the seminary library in Wake Forest in high school. My first thought: "this is way too cool for SEBTS."

Other than being a laundry day, today was pivotal in many respects.

[TRANSPORTATION] i have decided to stop driving my car. i have to pray to get up hills, and my average speed on a 10 mile trip has declined to 20mph when the speed limit ranges from 35-45mph. that just screams trouble. i called my dear old dad who said he would come look at it some time, but for now, i am just going to let it sit in the parking lot. You're a good car, Thomas Knox. Get well soon.

[MUSIC] i decided during christmas break to stop forcing myself to play the guitar. it had ceased being fun and fast becoming a chore. i decided i wouldn't pick it up again until i really really wanted to play. Tonight i was reading in the Psalms and i just wanted to sing. and so i sang. and then i thought... "hey, i can play that song on the guitar!" so i opened the case and tuned the dang thing and played it for two hours. my fingers are in severe pain but my soul is really happy. :o)

[READING] i finished _Left Behind_. it was predictable in the sense that it laid out the rapture just like i expected and some people got saved and the Anti-Christ emerged. i was generally entertained by some of the storyline though. Someone, please tell me... do Buck and Chloe get together despite the decade plus that seperates them in age?

spinning: my pick between my fingertips
reading: the Holy Bible

Today is laundry day. Many of you know the feeling. You reach into the drawer and find that you are lacking some necessity. For me, it's socks. i am wearing my last pair of clean socks. Socks are the indicator of laundry day in the winter. Since i don't wear socks in the summer, i am able to go a lot longer without doing laundry. Maybe i should just buy some more socks. This time around all my jeans need washing too so i might as well just go all out. It's sad, i was going to listen to Ian Wilmut talk about cloning tonight after i finished babysitting. But laundry just takes precendence.

Jim Hart is my hero. Thank you.

All I once held dear, built my life upon, all this world reveres and wars to own.
All I once thought gain I have counted loss, spent and worthless now compared to this.

Knowing You, Jesus, knowing You, there is no greater thing.
You're my all, You're the best, You're my joy, my righteousness,
and I love You Lord.

Now my heart's desire is to know You more, to be found in You, and known as Yours.
To possess by faith what I could not earn, all surpassing gift of righteousness

Knowing You, Jesus, knowing You, there is no greater thing,
You're my all, You're the best, You're my joy, my righteousness,
and I love You Lord.

Oh, to know the power of Your risen life and to know You in Your sufferings.
To become like You in Your death, my Lord, so with You to live and never die,

Knowing You, Jesus, knowing You, there is no greater thing,
You're my all, You're the best, You're my joy, my righteousness,
and I love You Lord.

spinning: the Beatles' Revolver, the Normals' a Place Where You Belong which releases 26 Feb and a mix cd.
reading: the BCP readings from the Holy Bible (ESV)

i am going away for the weekend for a retreat, so i figured i'd leave you with an account of some of the things my mind has lingered upon in the last 24 hours.
+ how much i wish we had a Target in Chapel Hill or Southwest Durham
+ the irony of getting a sweetheart that said merely "i wonder" as i walked into large group last night
+ is it illegal to go 30 in a 45?
+ how sad i am going to be when my car dies, as it currently seems to have some chronic illness
+ even though it usually is just friends of mine, i should not turn and wave when someone gives me a low whistle when i am walking alone down the street.
+ how sad it is that no one noticed that the shirt i wore today looks so much like the one the guy on Blues Clues wears. Does no one babysit?
+ that i just hate my roommate's ska praise CD

spinning: shuffling Big Star's #1 Record/Radio City, U2's The Best of 1980-90, and Glen Phillips' Abulum
reading: nothing yet today

At first, they sent another regiment out to battle with the excited legions assembled. Lights and wires and sounds... people standing so close to one another that everyone's sure another person couldn't squeeze into the room until one does. and then some more. A tall man, dressed simply, a black button down and jeans, trying hard to win approval before realizing that he owned the place, for just that day. His face contorted to show pain, frustration, anxiety and pleasure. Those assembled were mouthing words another sang, and barely knew it, they were so lost in the moment.

So, tonight was the big John Mayer show at Cat's Cradle. it was so good. That guy just kicks butt on the guitar. his strong jazz influence is even more apparent live than on his CDs. he played everything on his Sony release _Room for Squares_ except for "Great Indoors" plus "Love Soon" "Comfortable" and some other stuff. His guitar solos... whoa. He also tells amusing stories in concert. e.g. "The record company keeps telling me, 'john, you're album's going to go gold!' i say 'i've already got plenty of gold albums... they just say maxell on them.' yeah... i know you've got a burned copy. we've got some real ones here. and some t-shirts too. you ought to get one because you just can't burn a t-shirt."

"she thinks I can't see the smile that she's faking
and poses for pictures that aren't being taken
I loved you
grey sweatpants
no makeup
so perfect
our love was comfortable and so broken in
she's perfect, so flawless
I'm not impressed
I want you back"
that's from "comfortable," the first John Mayer song i ever heard. i had heard he didn't do it in concert anymore, but people make exceptions in Chapel Hill. it was a good crowd.

so, as John said, today is "the valentine's day." i didn't post the concert review to avoid that or anything. it's just going to be the highlight of the day for me. i mean, a girl can't expect to have a great v-day every year... i'm really okay with being dateless.

spinning: "comfortable" by John Mayer
reading: the Holy Bible

Today is Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent. These forty days were intended by Church fathers to be a time for people to contemplate Christ's sacrifice and were modeled after the forty day fast Christ took part in during his lifetime. Lent has always been a chance for me to set spiritual goals and spend time in reflection, so i happily welcome the season. One thing i am doing this year to participate is giving up Instant Messaging. So, i will miss you, IM friends, but i will be available via email so keep me up to date on all of the cool things going on in your lives!

spinning: "my stupid mouth" by John Mayer (in preparation for seeing him tonight!)
reading: _Henry IV, Part One_ by William Shakespeare

i was listening to this song that i heard live last weekend and i laughed so hard i had to share. the "mohawks on the scaffold" is a reference to something Annie Dillard wrote.

Everybody's gotta have a building program, stacking that money up, brick on brick
oh, we've got to have praise team worship, fourteen services, take your pick
Everybody's gotta have special music, don't want dead air when the plate goes by
we've got to give a three point sermon, with a pun and a poem to break the ice
organ hit the D chord, it's time to sing the doxology
stand up, praise the good Lord, please define doxology
well, now we take communion, but first a word to prepare our heads
joe gets up and talks politics, says a prayer and we break the bread
take the cup and quench our thirst, dismiss the children for children's church
stand and greet your neighbor first, every aspect is well rehearsed

like mohawks on the scaffold heedless of the danger
don't look down on the city, brother, it's a long way to fall
like mohawks on the scaffold, strolling on the I-beams
hallelujah, praise the Lord, he's our buddy after all

brother don't get too upset, i've got my perfect attendance badge
sunday school and VBS, i even pledged allegiance to the christian flag
(talking-- which i have not yet found anywhere in the scripture. what is the christian flag? wow!)
four years of bible college, well, i tucked my shirt and i cut my hair
oh, sister don't get too upset, i learned a lot about Jesus there
i went to class and i wore a tie, learned about who's wrong and why
point the finger at the other guy, with the clearly flawed theologi

we are mohawks on the scaffold heedless of the danger
don't look down on the city, brother, it's a long way to fall
like mohawks on the scaffold, strolling on the I-beams
hallelujah, praise the lord, He's a puzzle that i've solved

well i hope you're picking up on my sarcasm, because i'm laying it on pretty thick
it's a useful tool of communication, even God Himself has employed that trick
so if you'll turn with me in your bibles, to the book of Job, chapter 38
it'll remind us who we're dealing with, i hope you don't mind my paraphrase:
"Job you are a little weeny man and I am the God of all creation and i can zap you out of existance if i felt like it."
it's like we're sleeping on an air bus, taking home a bear cub
hiking mount vesuvius, like we're cooking smores on the burning bush

like mohawks on the scaffold, heedless of the danger
don't look down on the city, brother, it's a long way to fall
like mohawks on the scaffold, strolling on the I-beams
hallelujah, praise the Lord, He's so patient with us all
"Mohawks On The Scaffold" by Andrew Peterson

spinning: "mohawks"
reading: that book. still.

i have been very anecdotal lately on this blog, so i figure, what the heck. might as well tell everyone another story. after work, lunch and computer science, i was walking across campus and i (literally) bumped into my friend Susan. i was off in my own world, just thinking and grinning, and she grabbed me. "hey... Kristen!" "oh... hey Sus!" i see Susan a lot, so sometimes i ask her to hold me accountable to little things (and vice versa). She asked me how i was and i almost started laughing. "you look guilty, Kristen" "who me? no.... well, ok. yes. but it wasn't ALL my fault." and then i recounted something i had done that i had explicitly said the very night before that i would not do, ending with "i really am sorry about it." to which Susan responded, "i know, you're forgiven." but i hadn't sinned against Sus, really. so as we were walking away from each other i said, "do i need to say eight hail Marys or walk backwards across campus or anything as a penance?" And she said "Build an altar and sacrifice two doves by the end of the day. i'll let you know if the aroma is pleasing." i was ALREADY grinning so i must have had the mile high grin of a Chesire cat for at least the next few minutes. Immediately after that interaction, i came into the Pit and three friends of mine were all standing together, campaigning for Sr. Class Pres/VP (one is a candidate). And they had made a foursquare court in the middle of the Pit. So, i proceeded to make myself late to soccer by playing foursquare for a while with them. i couldn't retire until i made it to the King square. i am stubborn like that. but, it was just cool to get to play foursquare in the middle of campus.

spinning: "natchez trace" pierce pettis
reading: _left behind_ (for class)

Glorious things of thee are spoken, Zion, city of our God!
He, Whose Word cannot be broken, formed thee for His own abode.
On the Rock of Ages founded, what can shake thy sure repose?
With salvation’s walls surrounded, Thou may’st smile at all thy foes.

See! the streams of living waters, springing from eternal love;
Well supply thy sons and daughters, and all fear of want remove:
Who can faint while such a river ever flows their thirst t’assuage?
Grace, which like the Lord, the Giver, never fails from age to age.

Round each habitation hovering, see the cloud and fire appear!
For a glory and a cov’ring showing that the Lord is near.
Thus deriving from our banner light by night and shade by day;
Safe they feed upon the manna which He gives them when they pray.

"Glorious Things of Thee are Spoken" by John Newton (tune by Haydn). Sung this morning at The Church of the Apostles, the first Anglican church i've ever visited.

hmmm... i was listening to a mix CD with Jamie's song "Running" on it and i suddenly knew just what she was talking about. dang it.

What a good day. i woke up unexcited about giving a campus tour. i had decided to stay up late and deal with the fact that i would be tired and want to stay in my warm bed. It happened just that way. However, i did eventually motivate and shower, albeit late. i threw on some clothes and ran to the Office of Undergraduate Admissions to meet my group of families waiting to see Carolina. On the way, the brisk air gently stirred me into a state of complete consciousness, ready to walk backwards and talk about my university for an hour. My tour went fabulously. There were about a dozen people. The weather was perfect. when we walked out of the dining hall into the Pit there was beach music playing and people shagging. None of my group had ever seen campus so they were especially charmed. then, after i dropped off my group, i went back through the Pit and saw some friends who conned me into having lunch with them outside. :o) i got my paycheck, which is always a bonus. i went to get into my car and i realized i had left it in the wrong lot... and didn't have a ticket! It was a miracle! So, i got in the car, rolled down the windows, sang out loud and headed over to E.K. Poe Elementary in Durham to help one of my best friends with her 3rd grade class for a few hours. the school draws from a variety of neighbourhoods (majority low-income) and is almost evenly distributed between black, white and latino. it's really cool. i had fun helping them with math and chromatography, a research project they were working on. My friend and i walked down to Francesca's and got some dessert. mmmm. Now i am home, but off again for dinner and stuff with my dear friend/former roommate, Georgina. i love Fridays without classes!

it really disturbs me that someone has apparently read all of these books.

things that currently make me happy:
+ music by derek webb, pierce pettis, wilco (among others)
+ electronic mail
+ harris teeter having ben and jerry's on sale for $1.99/pint last week
+ my intervarsity staff worker (he asks hard questions and makes me think, plus his wife is having a baby in July!)
+ Grant Wacker's Heaven Below
+ mochas made with soy milk
+ my car
+ the german word politikverdrossenheit

"i do not understand my own actions. For i do not do what i want but I do the very thing i hate." --the Apostle Paul. i feel a lot like Paul today. i know what's wisest for me to do, but i don't have the willpower to do it.

i really appreciate my friends dawn and jamie. They are tremendously cool people who have similar interests to me and so i like spending time with them. But they go above and beyond in being hospitable to me. They let me do laundry at their apartment and feed me and let me sleep on their couch. They even provide comic relief for me. Like tonight, they were talking about this "bachelor party" they are invited to where everyone (men, women and couples) has to bring an eligible bachelor with them. They were arguing for and against the concept when
DAWN *sigh* nobody likes me.
JAMIE i like you.
DAWN well i can't marry you, you big dumbass. that'd start rumours!
i laugh. still.

i met this cool guy in Charlotte last weekend and knowing of my admiration for Pierce Pettis he sent me a copy of _Chase the Buffalo_ (which is out-of-print). It's so good. i wish that i could have all of you over to sit on my couch and listen, but since that's not quite possible, i'll post some lyrics.

+ + + +

The presence of your absence follows me
On trains and at the movies sitting next to empty seats
I wouldn't mind you going, if the emptiness would leave
But the presence of your absence follows me (you're not there)

The silence of your voice deafens me
The sound of no one answering every time I speak
The overwhelming quiet, so loud I cannot think
The silence of your voice deafens me (you're not there)

Heaven and earth could not make you stay
I'm damned by your memory that will not go away
The softness of your touch, the toss of your hair
Sometimes I even reach for you (But you're not there)

The thought of your love tortures me
Left to my own devices sleeping with the enemy
The unexpected flashbacks that I don't want to see
The thought of your love tortures me (you're not there)

Heaven and earth could not make you stay
I'm damned by your memory that will not go away
The softness of your touch, the toss of your hair
Sometimes I even reach for you (But you're not there)

(you're not there) The presence of your absence follows me
(you're not there) The silence of your voice deafens me
(you're not there) The thought of your love tortures me
You're not there / --"you're not there" pierce pettis

+ + + +

make a lot of money, make a lot of friends
when you lose that money, a lot of those friendships end
when you lose that job, lose that house, lose that car, lose that spouse
i will be here

spend a lot of time, til there's no time left
you become such a stranger, you don't even know yourself
you can never write, never call, you can surround yourself with walls
but i will be here

i am the friend you can not lose, i am the one you did not choose
i am the friend who loves you still, i am the friend who always will
be here, i will be here, yes, i will

it'd take a lot of work to drive me away
i can take a lot of hurt and i'm willing to share your pain
you don't impose, you don't intrude, i'll never turn my back on you
no, no, i will be here

eye for an eye, man that's such a bitter rule
it was only made to be obeyed by fools
there is no debt, there is no score, forget it, that's what friends are for
yeah, yeah, i will be here

i am the friend you can not lose, i am the one you did not choose
i am the friend who loves you still, i am the friend who always will
be here, i will be here, i will be here
i will be here, i will be here / --"i will be here" pierce pettis

O the deep, deep love of Jesus, vast, unmeasured, boundless, free!
Rolling as a mighty ocean in its fullness over me!
Underneath me, all around me, is the current of Thy love
Leading onward, leading homeward to Thy glorious rest above!

O the deep, deep love of Jesus, spread His praise from shore to shore!
How He loveth, ever loveth, changeth never, nevermore!
How He watches o’er His loved ones, died to call them all His own;
How for them He intercedeth, watcheth o’er them from the throne!

O the deep, deep love of Jesus, love of every love the best!
’Tis an ocean full of blessing, ’tis a haven giving rest!
O the deep, deep love of Jesus, ’tis a heaven of heavens to me;
And it lifts me up to glory, for it lifts me up to Thee!
O THE DEEP, DEEP LOVE OF JESUS by Samuel Francis, 1875

If you have been just driving yourself crazy trying to come up with that perfect valentine's day gift for me, just check my amazon.com wishlist. or you can buy me a domain. how fun could that be!

Sometimes, having a webloggin' younger sister is pretty funny. check out her friday five for tales of how i scarred and mended her during her childhood. For the record, i made the splint out of magazines and newspapers, binded it together with ribbons and used a towel as a sling. The doctor said it was both creative and functional. i was very proud. and the stitches thing... i didn't PUSH her, i more shifted myself so that she would not continue to bounce on me. Except, it sent her flying into the bolt. i was seven. i'm sorry, Janelle.

the reverse friday five is fun. keep on weighin' in!

i am going to Wake Forest University tonight to see Derek Webb, Andrew Peterson and Eric Peters. Not only will there be great music but lots of cool kids will be there (like Christiana, Dawn, Drew, Geneva, Jamie, Megan, Melissa, Patty, Richard, Sarah and Shalye) so i am pretty excited. Plus the UNC crew that's carpooling over is stopping at Stamey's for some yummy barbeque.

because YOU are so much cooler than i am...

[ T H E . R E V E R S E . F R I D A Y. F I V E ]

the concept is that i will ask some basic questions and you, most kind reader, will answer them in the comments section. then we can all learn about each other! this week's topic: travel.

.1. how old are you?
.2. where do you currently reside?
.3. what's the coolest place (in YOUR opinion) you've ever visited?
.4. what place do you most want to visit?
.5. where will you travel this weekend?